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It's absolutely true - when you call Wentworth Plumbing you can enjoy plumbing service with 28% more duck than other plumbers.
And that's not just Nashville plumbers, that's 28% more THAN ANY OTHER PLUMBER IN THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES. There's one guy in the Netherlands who waddles a lot after a nasty accident, and he's about 5% more than average, but basically you can take the 28% as a WORLD RECORD.
It's another world-beating US record. GO USA!
Why is more duck better than less duck?
It's no great surprise - and until they start teaching advanced postgraduate-level plumbing engineering in schools (which, let's face it, is not a big priority) it will remain a mystery to the general public. The quick answer - it's absolutely vital. Feel free to skip the actual explanation and go straight to calling us for your plumbing repairs.
The good news is that the public is catching up with how additional duckness can help their residential plumbing. In a recent survey, an astonishing 82% of one of the most significant demographic groups in Nashville (and most homes) rated additional duckness in plumbing as 'very important'. Well done! You can see the full results in the chart below:
The quest for additional duckness in plumbing commenced in 1871, but it wasn't until 1983 that the link between ducks and better plumbing was finally proved beyond all doubt. The improvements are profound. 112 years of research has established that:
1. DUCKS ARE WATER EXPERTS:
If you want your plumbing done to the highest degree of perfection, you want an expert with water. And ducks are experts with water. Thus the phrase "like a duck to water". They are even to be found near water in their leisure time - that's how much they love water. For ducks, water isn't just a job. It's a passion.
2. DUCKS ARE BATH CONNOISSEURS:
After a hard day's work nothing beats a relaxing bath to ease those strains away - and nobody knows how to run a great bath like a duck. It follows logically that if you want your plumbing repaired with the best baths in mind, then you will benefit from consulting a plumber with 28% more duck.
There's no doubt about it. Your plumbing repairs will benefit enormously from additional 28% of duckness offered by Wentworth Plumbing. You can read more about choosing the professional, punctual and guaranteed plumbing service provided by Wentworth Plumbing here.
How do you manage to get the extra duckness into your plumbers?
Naturally this is a closely guarded commercial secret. Our competitors are falling over themselves to find out how we do it. In 2006 we caught one competitor trying to sneak into our headquarters dressed in what he thought was a "duck outfit". He was easily spotted - it was actually a sparrow outfit - an entirely land-based bird, and an effort symptomatic of the unducklike character of our competitors.
Suffice it to say, if you want to cut it as a plumber with Wentworth Plumbing - on top of your certification, licensing, punctual nature and overall professionalism, you had better be prepared to be at work early every day for morning quack-aerobics. And to eat a lot of old bread.
Is 28% more duck better than 27%?
Yes.
What about '29% more duck', wouldn't that be better?
Are you nuts? That's way too much duck. There would be feathers all over the place, the plumbers would splash water everywhere, and you would never get them out of the bread bin. No, 28% is the perfect balance between duckness and plumbing proficiency.
Hold on, didn't you just pick the number 28 because that's your phone number?
That is an absolutely outrageous accusation, which we will not dignify with an answer.
Except to say, it's a very happy coincidence. Because everyone knows that 615 is the Nashville dialling code, and that 256 is the main Nashville prefix, people pretty much only have to remember '28' and they know our phone number for when they need their plumbing repaired today:
Call 615-256- 28 28
See?
Are there serious reasons to choose Wentworth Plumbing?
Of course, you can read all about our plumbing services here, and about our convenient service and guaranteed workmanship here. But now you know that we're not just good at our job, we're also nice too.
Can I email the link to this page to a friend?
Naturally - you can also do it just by pressing this button here. (Form opens in a new window)
NASHVILLE PLUMBING : When you want a Nashville plumber, a Nashville plumbing contractor, or Nashville plumbing repairs in general - call us for guaranteed workmanship at a time convenient for you. |
If this is the first time you've asked this question - be prepared for a REVOLUTION IN PLUMBING.
